Wednesday, April 28, 2004

The boy is back in town

The wierd things you do when you're missing someone. You keep expecting to just open up the door and there they are. I did this several times yesterday, upstairs and down. Vicki and I even wandered the neighborhood at dusk calling for him. No dice.

About 9:00pm, I was sitting downstairs at the computer, and I was about to head back upstairs when I thought "ah, I'll just look outside the back door again".... there he was, looking up, as surprised to see me as I was to see him. "Holy sh*t!", he seemed to be saying with his eyes, "I can't believe I found the right place!"

"Get in here, Bart", I told him. Stupid cat. Oh well. I picked him up. He commenced frantic purring and kneading and sniffing. Hey, he smelled fresh. He appears no worse for wear. Some vegetation stuck here and there in his fur. As I was going upstairs, Vicki said "Did Bart knock on the back door?" She had no way of knowing outright that I was currently carrying him up the stairs. "Basically", I said.

Didn't mention the Anutt purging trip. We went. Loie still has trouble letting go of things. I understand. They're often perfectly good and useful things. Many of them sentimental. I have some of the same tendencies myself, on a much smaller scale. On the other hand, memories are in our heads, not in the things, and really, there's only so much room in our lives for stuff. If we really need it later, we can obtain it again. She hasn't found that balance between what I need now in this phase of my life vs what my past has been, and what my dreams are. And she's so close to it she's probably the only one who can't see it -- at least not easily. Don't know how much of the Dawna Walters book she read. I know she talks a lot about these things in there.

But, she did pretty good for Loie -- it was a start. Momentum is everything in this game, so we hope she keeps going -- it gets easier if you keep it up -- and then go for a second iterative pass with a new attitude -- after you've tasted the freedom that purging can give you. Space -- the big "nothing", has much more value than people give it.

Well, we have this weekend to do a little organizing at our place... there are rumors of a neighborhood garage sale, too.... then next Wednesday we leave for Indiana and the graduation/mother's day/mother's birthday thing. Then another two weeks after that, it's Tetonsville!

It's extremely windy today. Ok, yes, there's that, but I'm also a weather buff. I love wind. There are other things it brings out the fluid grace in as well.

I'm off...